Failure To Attract

…And this friend always has an amazing insight to share. I read this one tonight and loved how she worded it, so I thought I’d share it with the world:

Inside of every living being is a solid nugget of pure fucking awesome, surrounded by flabby, lazy, sorry-for-itself, ugly, ashamed, disgusting bullshit. Every second of every minute of every day of its life, each and every living being ought to be working like a goddamn fiend, scratching, clawing, snatching the odd breath, fighting, pulling, striving, digging through that bullshit; working just to see the faintest glimmering shine of that potential through a thinner layer of crap.

Some dead things hate you for digging. They don’t even exist. Just ignore their wailing and keep digging; live.

If you don’t, yer doin’ it wrong.

Isn’t that amazing?

I’m sure you’ve had a day at your 9-5 where from the moment you walked through the door, you felt like you could cut the tension with a knife? You feel that oppressing weight of uncomfortable tension weigh heavily on you, when people you get along with normally just snap and the negativity is stifling?

Yeah, that’s the kind of soup I’m sitting right in the middle of right now.

I’ve never been good with dealing with this kind of stress; I’ve just been really sensitive to the feel and energy of my surroundings, and this suffocating atmosphere is almost a little too much for me. It’s days like today that I really question my employment here.

Now don’t get me wrong, I like this place normally, and I understand that every job has it’s down days… but I still can’t help but think about how different my life would be if I had started early.

I know that motivation has always been my problem, and working around 60 hours a week at this job doesn’t help my motivation to do more work after that… but I know that’s what it takes, and I wish I just had a direction I could go in. I have no idea what I want to do, I only have ideas on how to maybe make some money, but there really isn’t something I’m just aching or screaming to do, something that I’ve wanted to do for ages that could be a lucrative thing. I have passions, but so far they aren’t things that could make any money, and beyond doing what you love - money is a big factor. Especially when you’re trying to support yourself and others on your own.

I’m trying to set an intention to help guide me in the proper direction.

Wish me luck!

Last night I found out that the one opera I’ve been wanting to see for several years is in Austin - for today. The tickets were mostly sold out, except for the nosebleed section - not for me.

I’m a little bummed that it happened, but I know that it’ll be back. I just wanted to share with you all the most powerful song (in my opinion) of Verdi’s Requiem.

-David

So I’m sitting at my favorite hangout place here in Austin, TX - an amazing hookah bar on the Drag in Austin. For those of you not in the know, the Drag is this strip of Guadalupe down right next to the UT campus. It apparently hasn’t changed much in the past few decades, and I’m very glad for that. It gives this great laid back feeling, something that seems to be pretty uniquely Austin. They have live music almost every night, if not every night. And most musicians in Austin are fantastic.

My favorite band has no name yet, just their names - Clayton, Mike, and Steve. I put that in bold, because they’re just that good. I’m listening to them now, actually, sans Mike, he’s working tonight apparently.

I guess I should give some information about the hookah, so I’m just going to copy the information listed in Wikipedia:

Hookah (Hindi: हुक्का, Urdu: حقہ hukka) or shisha (Arabic: شيشة‎, Hebrew: נרגילה, Nargilah‎) or (Turkish: nargile) is a single or multi-stemmed (often glass-based) water pipe device for smoking. Originating in India,^[1] it has gained popularity, especially in the Arab World. It had gained popularity under the reign of the Ottoman Sultans. A hookah operates by water filtration and indirect heat. It can be used for smoking herbal fruits. More information here. It’s a great, relaxing, social thing that can give a natural - and legal - high. Nothing like any illicit substances, just a great feeling. Highly enjoyable.

I’ll be posting a video of this place, as well as a few fun pictures, within the next few days, when I get my phone fixed.

-David